New York (Rooters) -- Rooters has learned that hundreds of steel company executives will be indicted in what sources at both the US Justice Department and the SEC say may be one of the biggest acts of business fraud in US history.

According to the sources, authorities, acting on a tip from renowned metallurgical expert Rosie O'Donnell, discovered that fire could not melt steel.

"Who knew," asked one SEC official who requested anonymity.

"Without Rosie O'Donnell's keen insight, who knows how long this fraud would have gone on," commented another official.

"These lousy bastards in the steel industry from Carnegie on down have perpetrated a fraud on the investing public and the world on a scale unseen in the history of human civilization," said the official.

Another source at the US Justice Department told Rooters that officials were also looking into questioning the descendants of Sir Henry Bessemer* in an effort see if he had any connection to the conspiracy.

"We have reason to believe that Bessemer was into this up to his eyeballs," said the high-ranking Justice Department official, who also requested anonymity.

According to her spokesman, Ms. O'Donnell was too busy working in her laboratory to take a call from a reporter, and was unavailable for comment.

*The original version of this Rooters story read "ancestors of Bessemer," which of course makes as much sense as melting steel does to Rosie O'Donnell.